red, gold, and green

Well the school year is dwindling, and with it, my store of fabulous lesson plans. Let's face it - I'm tired. And can't be bothered to sing and dance my way into my 9th graders' hearts any longer.

I did, however, get their attention today when I put the following picture up on the projector:


That's right, Monster Pig, weighing in at an astounding 1,051 pounds and bagged several weeks ago by 11-year old Jamison Stone in Alabama. Jamison says he "probably won’t ever kill anything else that big.” Smart kid. Jamison's dad says they'll probably make sausage out of the beast. 700-800 pounds of sausage. Holy crap.

It's literally the only thing I can think of to blog about as I'm just flabbergasted at the size of this thing. I mean, really. It's like something out of a horror movie.

Incidentally, if giant pigs are your thing, there have been plenty more:

Hogzilla
Shot June 17, 2004 - 800 lbs

Coursey Hog
Shot January 5, 2007 - lbs

Hog Kong
Shot August 2004 - 1,140 lbs

Big Bill
Put down in 1933 after breaking a leg - current world record holder at 2,552 lbs

Ton Pig
Died February 4, 2004 (from lack of mobility due to obesity) - 1,980 lbs

Mmmm, bacon.

a little too late

Well, this is my life. The life I have chosen. The life for which I get paid nary more than peanuts. (Thanks to RedKudu for the awesome post)

In other news, I'm still counting down the days and (slowly) checking things off my enormous list of "Things You MUST Do Before Graduation!". Our trip to Lake Tahoe this weekend was incredible, relaxing, and full of good times and it's sort of hard coming back to reality and dealing with students cheating on make-up work and my crazy, totally off her rocker master teacher. However, I will prevail and make it to the (three-day!) weekend and go home and eat my mom's food and continue to count down the days until this horrible, painful, never-ending year from hell is actually over.

I feel like I'm a perpetual need of a good long nap. Sheesh.

soon we'll be back on the road again

This weekend, Daniel and I are going to Lake Tahoe with his parents (without the snow, obviously). I'm so excited to get out of Davis and not think about school or teaching or anything for a few days. Hooray!

let your clarity define you

Today is the first day of Whole Earth, hands-down my absolute favorite weekend in all of Davis!


After grabbing lunch with Liz and Tina at Cafe Bernardo (they have a new menu and it's pretty good), I strolled onto campus (almost running into Neal, of all people) and picked up a new Peace on Earth Bead while I perused the rest of the goods. I'm looking forward to going back tomorrow when the crunchy granola-ness is in full force.

ready for anything

That last post was not complete and therefore I did not intend to post it at the time. So it goes. Anyway... here it is in it's final glory:

I haven't had a celebrity crush in, well.... ever. But Chris Lowell (from my beloved Veronica Mars) is just so adorable.


I mean, seriously people. Adorable.

Aaaaaaaand, 1 month and 2 days until graduation!! Eeek!

let it never be said

Whoah man, the countdown is in full effect, my friends. 1 month, 4 days until graduation and a hell of a lot to do until then including (but not limited to) my CPR course, American Consitution exam, fingerprinting (again??), TB test, more paperwork at the district office, writing finals, finishing "The Odyssey", teaching the autobiographical incident, and (hopefully) completing my research and analysis for my inquiry class.

Oh yeah, and renting a cap and gown. Ick.

STAR testing is this week, which means my schedule is stupid and I don't teach until almost noon every day and then my students don't want to do any work. I hate having my mornings free because while in theory it's nice to sit around and drink coffee and read the news, I would much rather get up and get my classes over with and then have the day to myself. It does, however, mean I can finish my peer observations without having to find a time after my classes, which is a nice little gift from the scheduling gods.

Special Ed class tonight and then small group. I feel like I've been neglecting my girls :(

true story

A great Friday Haiku from The Reflective Teacher, one of my favorite edubloggers:

knock three times

Well, it's official (as of Thursday): I'm the newest Engish teacher at Woodland High School!

I'm just so glad the whole ordeal is done. I know I shouldn't complain, what with three school districts and one youth group all wanting to hire me, but now I can focus on teaching "The Odyssey", prepping for summer school, and finishing my research.

But right now I'm going to go lay out by the pool with my mom and read.

shoebox of photographs

I'm just feeling a lot of anxiety. And writer's block. Blah.

follow the bright lights
they might change you.
if you get lost along the way,
it's alright.
we'll find another way to dance
-young love

here i stand

So here's the deal. I'd like to pretend that I'm ready and willing to do anything and go anywhere like I was a year or two ago, but in all honesty I'm scared and nervous and anxiety-ridden and I don't know what I want to do or what I should do or even what I'm being called to do. I just know what everyone is telling me and I feel like most of them are speaking for personal selfish gain and not for what is going to be best for me next year.

All I want is to finish my MA and to make enough money to survive and to not feel like my head is going to explode at any moment.

I'm not ready to teach my classes tomorrow because I've spent all evening stressing out about this interview tomorrow that I don't even want to go to because I just have no idea what I'm going to tell them or if they'll even give me a choice. I thought this time in my life was about options. So why do I feel like I'm screwed either way?


Thanks to everyone who celebrated today with me and Nick and our families. We had a blast and I'll put some pictures up soon.

to mourn and to grieve

I have been glued to the television since yesterday, keeping up with all the progress since yesterday's tragedy at Virginia Tech.

Today, I asked my students to journal in response to the shooting. Do they feel personally affected when they read about school violence? What causes people to act violently against their communities? Do they feel safe at Johnson? How can we (as students, faculty, and administrators) make Johnson a safer place to be?

The responses were heartbreaking. None of my students feel safe at our school. They feel threatened by the gangs on campus, the sheer size of the school, and how "ghetto" it is (their words, not mine). How can I expect my students to focus on learning when they feel unsafe every time they set foot on campus?

i believe

I haven't talked about God much lately. To be honest, I haven't cognitively thought about God much lately. I just feel so... overwhelmed. I remember this time last year, I was so aware of the direction of my life and God's hand in it and now... I feel like I'm just counting down the days until June and I hate that feeling because I've always been to committed to the now and I'm definitely not these days.

I'm dreading going back to school tomorrow, even though we've finally started to hit a stride and things are going pretty smoothly. It's just really depressing - the school, the students, the quality of the work that gets done (when it gets done at all). I started teaching because I wanted to make a difference, I wanted to have an impact. But honestly, I'm nothing more than a blip on these kids' radar. I'm not going to be the teacher who gets them to write a 5-paragraph essay. They aren't interested in impressing me, or pleasing me, or even placating me. I'm lucky if they come to class at all.

And the school, oh the school. That place is like a prison. I get depressed just driving into the parking lot. Why can't we put more money into our schools? Why is everything always broken? I teach in a 50 degree classroom in the winter and a 90 degree classroom in the fall and spring. Why don't I have any supplies? How hard is it to get some construction paper so we can make posters?

Almost exactly a year ago, I blogged about discontent. I was frustrated about different things, but my outlook then was so much better than my outlook today. Lord, give me insight and peace.

[Sometimes] I completely forget about God’s undeniable goodness and start grumbling and complaining, walking through my rainy Davis days thinking, “Why am I here? What is the point? Why am I working so hard at all this? God, when will you bless me?”

And I need to be disciplining myself to recognize God's blessings in the ordinary everyday, not just the extraordinary adventures that He sends me on... Because I think the boring everyday requires us to move forward on faith alone as well, it just doesn't seem as exciting.

...I desire to find the joy of the Lord in every single thing I do, and while I have been blessed to go on exciting adventures and work with spirit-filled people and experience God in powerful ways in beautiful places, life isn't always like that. Sometimes I'm stuck in Davis or the Bay on a dreary day and I wish I was at Lake Berryessa or in Maui or skiiing in Tahoe or even working the carnival at COTW but instead I'm reading about the philisophical foundations of education or folding laundry or looking for a new apartment. But God is good and present in all of these things - the breathtaking and the mundane, the exciting and the routine, the life-changing and the sometimes lifeless.

How blessed am I, Lord, to have breath in my lungs and a song on my lips? How awesome is this place that I am surrounded by Your blessings, even when I don't always recognize it? Life is beautiful, even when I'm not in New York, and especially when I'm right here.

the one who is brave

I'm so sick of grad school it makes me want to vomit.

No, I haven't finished my proposal. Yes, it was due on Thursday.

Shut up.

singing words of wisdom

Lest ye forget, my birthday is in 6 days (6! Crazy!) and I like books. Lots and lots of books...

where we might end up

"A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved."

Kurt Vonnegut
1922-2007

would you cry for the weak

I'm at the North Davis Starbucks. I came here with two objectives:

1) finish (OK, start) grading the collaborative "Romeo & Juliet" essays from my 9th grade class,
2) finish (OK, start) my research proposal for my seminar tomorrow.

2 1/2 hours later, my head is throbbing from grading 20 or so of the worst essays I have ever had the misfortune of reading. Seriously, have they not been listening to a single thing I have said for the past six weeks? Holy crap. Grades are due this Friday and over half the class completely tanked. Great.

I also haven't made much progress on my proposal, which is due tomorrow. To be honest, I don't really know what I'm doing. I started the year thinking I wanted to focus on Reader's Theatre, but even though it improved overall class reading engagement and comprehension, most of the students totally hate it because it means they actually have to do something in class other than sit around taking up space. So all of my preliminary data and research is worthless and I have to start over and, sheesh, I graduate in like 6 weeks and I just want to be done with it and it's not even started. I don't really know how much of this 4-page proposal I can BS...

I also have to write another cover letter. I hate writing cover letters. Why do you need a cover letter when I'm sitting right here in front of you? Gah, would someone just hire me already? I'm sick of interviewing and interviewing and interviewing...

My 23rd birthday is in 8 days. Am I really almost 23? Is that even possible? I still feel like such an aimless, ridiculous college student sometimes. I don't want to grow up. I kind of foolishly feel like turning 23 is some sort of mandatory, "You must become a serious adult" death sentence. I don't really want to be a serious adult. I don't really want to be serious period, adult or no. I just kind of want to lay out in the sun and read good books and laugh a lot.

Can I get paid to do that? Cause I'm really good at it. Let me write you a cover letter about that (0r about how I just spent 20 minutes blogging instead of doing my work. Adult I am not...)

EDIT: WJUSD just called and wants to set up another (is this number 3?) meeting to start my paperwork. Hallelujah.

have the time

Picnic Day is next weekend. I had completely forgotten.

I have a feeling I'll be grading all day...

who will fight the giant?

The cat's out of the bag, folks. Jamie just called and offered me a job at UCC for next year.

Whoah dang.


Updated Countdowns:
Days until my birthday: 15
Days until me and Nick's joint birthday party of awesomeness: 18
Days until I graduate (!!): 71
Days until I start teaching summer school: 75
Days until I leave for HAWAII!: 101
Days until Daniel and I (hopefully) go to Disneyland: 107

the air that i breathe

Home for spring break - picture update!

First, Lindy's wedding was phenomenal:

Lindy was beautiful,

we hit the dance floor like nobody's business,

Bethany and I caused a ruckus,

and the sorority was out in full force.

Daniel was there too, of course. :)

And let's not forget last weekend's epic celebration of Bethany's 21st at Froggy's:


All the pictures from that adventure can be found here.

And now I have a week off. For real. Job updates after the break, I promise. There's a lot going on.

let the rain fall down

I am officially on Spring Break! Just 4 more screening interviews, 1 follow-up interview, 1 rehearsal dinner & wedding, 1 children's musical performance, and 1 staff meeting until I get to go home and... work for my dad for a week.

BUT grades are almost done (they're due the week I get back) and I'm hugely looking forward to spending tomorrow night with Lindy and the girls relaxing before an exciting Saturday of wedding madness.

I hope I get hired before my birthday. Talk about celebrating!

EDIT: Today I had my 9th graders watch the Oprah Building a Dream special about her Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa. We had an interesting discussion afterward about the value of schooling in South Africa versus the United States, which eventually led to the topic of the "American dream". I told my students that, for many people, the American dream consists of having a lot of money, a fancy car, and a huge house. For me, however, it pretty much just entails teaching students.

They looked at me like I was crazy. And maybe I am.